Baby Blog

We're about as far behind as can be with documenting the milestones and going's on of this pregnancy, so we thought we'd do our best to give a recap up to date.

Finding out: On the morning of December 31, 2006 I woke up about 6:30 AM to go to the bathroom. Since we had started trying for a baby in November and since I was 6 days late, I decided that I would take a pregnancy test. I had already taken one on December 21 with a negative result, so my motivation to take the test was less due to any suspicion that I was actually pregnant, and more with the hope that taking the test would catalyze the onset of my ever-elusive period (it seemed that in prior months when I was late the only thing that could get things moving along was to spend the money and waste a test--however frustrating, it did the trick every time). A bit sleepy, and unsuspecting, I finished washing my hands and was confused as I watched the first line appear--in the wrong place. I was accustomed to seeing the control line appear and the test area remain empty, yet there was a line showing up in the test area. As the second pink line began to appear (the control line I was used to seeing), things started feeling a bit unreal--almost the way you feel when things go in slow motion for a minute. My hands immediately flew to my gaping mouth and I only wish I could have seen the size of my eyes. I believe my first reaction was "What?!", a thought I heard myself whisper over and over again as I continued to watch the lines darken. As I knelt and said a quick prayer of gratitude and disbelief, the only witnesses in the bathroom with me that early morning were the few tears that managed to make their way down the face of a girl whose dream of being a mother was coming true, even though it felt so unreal. My shock in the bathroom quickly turned into extreme excitement to wake Austin and tell him he was going to be a daddy. Unprepared with a creative way to break the news, yet determined to do something to make it special, I sat down at the computer and began to compose a poem (this idea came from my mom's approach to telling my dad that Dustin was on the way). After the first few thoughts came into print I just couldn't believe what I was trying to express, so I retrieved the test strip from the bathroom and set it on the desk next to me as a source of reassurance that this life-changing event really was happening, even though fifteen minutes earlier I oblivious to it.

Breaking the news to Austin: Even though part of me wanted to wait to tell him (especially because I couldn't believe it myself and wanted to take a second--and third-- test to be sure), my excitement was so intense that I had to tell him. It was probably 7:30 that Sunday morning when I went back into our bedroom and, for just a moment, I watched him sleeping. The thought crossed my mind that I was about to tell him something that would change his life forever. I sat on the bed next to him and gently tried to wake him up, aware that Sunday was normally the closest he got to sleeping in, and told him that I made something for him. He opened one of his eyes half way, doing his best to show interest mid sleep (poor guy). Fully awake and excited, I wanted him to sit up and eagerly read the poem aloud, but I knew he was probably more perplexed as to why I was waking him up. "I wrote you a poem" I explained (as if that were the right thing to say to a sleeping man to get him to happily jump from his slumber--oh well, I'm learning). I told him that I would read it to him so he could keep his eyes closed. Throughout the first few lines I could see that he was making a great effort to show his interest, as one or both eyebrows would occasionally lift upward in reaction to a rhyme or he would reach for my hand after a romantic sentiment was expressed. It was almost comical to watch him caught between sleep and 'humoring' his wife in the most polite ways possible. I remember feeling my heart pounding as I reached the last line of the poem and announced, "I just found out you'll be a dad!" At those words, his head, which was tipped in the other direction, jerked toward me just in time for me to watch his eyes pop in the most dramatic way imaginable. He quickly sat up and hugged me, then seconds later asked all of the questions that a shocked father-to-be asks at this moment ("Are you serious?" "Are you sure?" etc.). I could only show him the test result and say that I thought so.

The poem:

Good morning, Love. This gorgeous day
There's something that I've got to say.
Thank you for loving me
And for the "us" and for the "we".
I love the fact that I'm your wife
And know we'll build a happy life.
And happier, by just a tad,
I just found out you'll be a dad!!


The aftershock: The next few hours are what I refer to as Austin's "glazed-over" phase. Since church was at 9:00 we spent the next hour or so getting ready, but neither of us was thinking about the make-up application or the shave job, etc. It was while he was putting on his tie that I asked him if he was overwhelmed. "Yes," was the only response. I got a little worried that he was upset by the news, or that the shock of reality made him wish we had not been trying for a baby. He walked dazedly around the house, and maintained the same look of disbelief as we walked into the chapel and sat down. During the first hymn I noticed him looking at the (large) family in the front row. He slowly leaned over to me and, in a drawn-out whisper, mumbled, "Seven kids..." I chuckled and said, "Just imagine how many times he's felt overwhelmed!" Later in the meeting he leaned toward me and asked, "Is this really happening?" I just responded, "I don't know, love." The inquiry, for some reason, made me feel better because I realized that he wasn't necessarily upset, but rather he was just in shock like I was. During our combined Relief Society/Priesthood meeting that day, he finally leaned over and said, "All I know is that this thing better be a boy!" Upon hearing his more jovial tone, I felt more of the excitement come back. Later that afternoon, we took this picture. This is our "we just found out we're having a baby" picture.